Nap Inspired Genius

I love napping. I always have, always will. There are some moments when I feel guilty about taking my daily hour and a half nap in the Dominican Republic, mostly when I think about my friends and family in full time jobs or juggling grad school and internships and life and all of that, but then I fall asleep and the guilt passes. Sorry guys. I find that it's not the rest that I love, but that somehow when I come out of my naps and my brain is switching over from sleep mode to wake up and smell the coffee mode, I surprise myself with good ideas. It's where I've decided to take a vacation with my dad before I head home, it's where I decided I'm going to write a book, where I planned my outfits for the first week I'm home, and where I figured out a way to appreciate my last days here in a way that will let be thankful for the time that's left, and focus a little more on the present. I've mention my anxiety and my want to come home despite how much I loe it here a thousand times, so let's just move past that saga and pretend I've described it again, shall we? You don't really have a choice, so just nodd and smile. Obviously as the days become less in number, my anxiety is increasing because I want to go home and, as I mentioned before, I'm afraid somehow I won't make it. Call me irrational, it's true, but the feelings are real and they often take away from my ability to enjoy my time here. I've tried to combat it in different ways, and at night when I pray, I list ten things that I'm grateful for to remind myself that life is good, and beautiful, and full of happy things. As I've progressed through doing this, I've found that I'm focusing more on things I'm grateful for because I miss them, rather than because I am experiencing them here. And so, kind of subconsciously when I was waking up, I confronted this issue and decided to find one thing every day that I am not only grateful for, but that I could only have experienced here, in the Dominican. And thus, I am presenting this list to you. Some are things from last week, some are from this week. All only could happen here, and are things I would have missed out on if i did what I wanted and jumped ship last week. These are the things that are keeping me calm, and reminding me that no matter how tough some days are, how hard it can be to find peace amongst the anxiety, I wouldn't have given up my time here for the world. 1. A chicken laid an egg in my clothes today. Literally straight up roosted itself amongst my jeans, tank tops and shorts, and laid its egg in the middle of its make shift nest. It reminded me what it's like to laugh at unexpected surprises, and how much I like scrambled eggs. 2. Lacking a baseball, I watched Freddy's sons and friends play baseball with a child's bat elongated with a stick, and the tops of water jugs. It reminded me how even when people here have nothing, they make something work. It also reminded me how at home, we seem to need the best and newest of everything, and forget that sometimes its more fun to play with the box than the actual toy. 3. I lost horrifically in dominoes to my friend at the nursing home. I ended up playing with him by accident because my friend Ramone turned me down, saying his legs hurt. How that pertains to dominoes, I'm not sure, but I found myself playing with Julio, who was not only a better player but a better sport. I hadn't asked him to play before because he has Parkinson's and I wasn't sure if he had the muscle control to play. He clearly does, and can kick my ass. It reminded me not to be afraid to ask questions, and not to judge by appearances. 4. I got to sit in on a general assembly meeting at ADESJO where all of the community leaders come together once a month to air grievances and talk about what's happening. Understanding all of the proceedings showed me how far I've come in my Spanish. Hearing people bitch, complain and congratulate ADESJO reminded me of the importance of free speech, and of having an organization that not only  provides a safe place for people to talk and air their opinion, but relies on that as the basic function of their operation.  5. I returned to Rancha Arriba with Freddy to meet with some more people in the community and sort out some organizational matters. It reminded me how much I really do just love truck rides through the mountains. It also reminded me how poverty here exists on another level. How  5 dollars is something we may throw away at home, but can change a life, at least for a day, here. It also reminded me of the importance of sun screen as it was a very hot day. 6. I ate arroz con leche sitting outside on a worn out adirondack chair while looking at the mountains and a tree that looks like something out of the African planes in the lion king. it reminded me to be grateful for my view, because it will change in a few days. 7. I went walking and had to navigate my way around Spanish speaking children, motorcycles, broken irrigation tubes which cause flooding, chickens, cow poop, actual cows, big rocks, and scattering salamanders. It reminded me to look where I'm going, because I didn't and I fell.  8. I drank coffee with way too much sugar, and loved it. It reminded me how important coffee is to the culture, but more so how it's important to take the time and enjoy it. To take five minutes. 9. Upon waking up from my nap, Argentina prepared me two mangoes from their trees outside. Apparently when eating a mango, one is not enough and two is the absolute minimum. It reminded me how much I just really love mango. And how expensive they will be once I'm home. 10. Did I mentioned a chicken laid an egg in my clothes? Let me remind you. A chicken. Laid an egg. In my clothes. This is by no means a great list, or the best one. It's not perfectly written, grammatically correct or full of grandiose things. But it's helpful. Is helpful because it reminds me to be grateful of things everyday no matter how I'm feeling.  It reminds me that even when I want to be somewhere else, I can find something to be grateful for here. And it reminds me that as much as I want to come home now, it would mean missing these little things, which I don't think I could live without. And it gives me strength to make it through until next weekend, when I can be home and bring my heart physically to where it is emotionally. Until then, I will keep napping, keep living and keep listing. I hope you do the same.